Terra Lim, a 21 year old woman has came out to stand up for the #metoo movement, which has been gaining huge traction in many parts of the world.
According to her recount, ” this is a secret that I’ve been holding on to for 3 years now since it happened.”
Furthermore, she added, “The reason why I kept it a secret was because I was still in school and I was young, hence I was scared of people finding out the truth. But now that it’s nearly been a year since I graduated and I have a whole other life, with the additional #MeToo and #TimesUp movement happening, I’m finally given an opportunity to talk about this. I’m ready.”
She came clean about what transpired between her, and the rapist, Earle Ronda, in his flat at Sembawang.
They met in Republic Polytechnic (RP) and were classmates before getting together.
“We were fooling around in his room, one thing led to another and…. he suddenly put his penis inside me. I was a virgin, he was not.
Prior to that happening, I had no intention of having sex with him or losing my virginity to him, ever. He didn’t ask me about it either. He didn’t ask if I wanted to have sex with him. He didn’t ask if I wanted it. He just simply put it inside me without my consent.”
You can read the full account here
When it happened, she felt the sharpest pain in her vagina and yelled out “OW!”. He pulled away quickly and he started apologising, saying he was sorry and it was an “accident”.
The question is: How do you accidentally put your penis into someone’s vagina, really?
After the unhappy and “accidental” ordeal, Terra laid on his bed for a long time just waiting for the sharp pain to fade.
“I didn’t even realise I was bleeding. It was after what seemed like 10 minutes that I got up slowly to go to the toilet, that we realised that I had bled a full amount. The blood stain on his sheets was the size of my palm.”
She continued, “After I got out of the toilet, he had already taken off his sheets and he told his mom that my period came, hence the blood. That fucking liar.
I told him that I needed a moment and he left me alone in his room. That was when I called my best friend and I cried to her. I cried and I described the feeling of losing something involuntarily and I can never get it back. I didn’t know why I was so upset…. I just was.”
She went home shortly afterwards.
The next day, they headed to school as per normal. She felt down but nothing else happened. They continued to date for another three months before breaking up with each other.
If things weren’t already bad enough, they had to stick with each other for the next two years in school and in classes, having to be in the same project group as well.
“I had to do group work with my rapist”, she said.
It’s been three years since that fateful night but she still remembers everything vividly.
She kept this incident a secret as she was afraid of being judged and “Everybody knew everybody in school so there was no way I could say anything… I didn’t want to go to school everyday with people judging me as it was.”
Earle also rapped another girl he was dating when he was in his secondary school.
“He lost his virginity by raping her, and he took mine by raping me,” said Terra.
She ended the message with a strong call for proper sexual education and a more realistic and accurate protrayal of rape, claiming that “rape can happen behind closed doors without any physical struggles… as it happened to me and Earle’s ex-girlfriend.”
If you want to play a bigger part in Singapore’s version of #metoo edition, look out for their next dialouge here,
hosted by A Good Space
Read more about ending sexual assault here
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